Feeling uneasy...

I have found it so hard to write lately ... perhaps like my wise Emily Duffield once stated, I just needed to wait until inspiration came. I'm not sure if inspiration has come or not or maybe I just feel like typing but whatever it is I am writing a new blog.

Lately I have been feeling uneasy. I have also been feeling frustrated, tired, sick, bored, lonely, happy, excited, and unsettled. So yeah I think uneasy is the best feeling to describe me right now.

I used to be such a homebody, content to stay here in Ontario. In grade 11 I took my first big trip by myself, I went to England to see my favourite British friend Liz. Since then I have traveled to 5 provinces and 2 different continents by myself, and now I can't stay still. God has put travel and missions on my heart so much that it is so incredibly hard when I am not doing it. I know that training, preparing and growing is such a huge part of it, but I sometimes forget to do all that learning and strengthening and growing and everything at home. I guess sometimes that uneasy feeling can have its benefits because I know I am more likely to take that step out in faith and follow through on whatever journey I feel God is leading me on.

I am in the process of finding an internship for my school right now. The feeling of uneasiness comes there as well. I want to be challenged and learn and grow so much from this internship, but I need to find one first. There are a couple options that I am looking into right now, some more realistic then others. The thing is though, I love adventures! So a big part of my heart just wants to be irresponsible and adventurous and pursue the placement that seems a little bit crazy. I'll keep you posted on how the placement searching goes.

But, now that it is almost 3am I better stop writing. So here’s to praying that I know where God wants me now and in the future and that I can feel completely confident in it all. Good night all!